When I examine homework assignments or activities in her calendar, my ADHD teen says I’m nagging. However how can I support her if i don’t recognize what’s going on?
Q: “Twice a week, ns make mine 14-year-old daughter sit down through me to display me she planner and also assignments. She gets so angry once I perform this. She feels prefer I’m nagging, however I require to understand what is walking on with her schoolwork and activities to setup our family members calendar and also to anticipate locations where she might need support. That a consistent battle. What have the right to I do?” – CRosen
Your inquiry really resonated through me. As soon as my kid (who has actually ADHD) was in center school, WE would organize bi-weekly meetings. “We” is the operative word. I presented these “meetings” to Eli together a joint-partnership, and also not together a one-sided conversation. It was vital to me that he feel it to be as crucial to recognize what was going ~ above in mine week as much as I necessary to know his. A level playing ar you can say. And also I’m thinking possibly that’s what is lacking for you.
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With phones and planners in hand, we spent a few minutes at the start (usually Sundays) and in the center (Wednesdays) that the main reviewing upcoming college assignments, after college activities, personal appointments, family members events, etc. We talked about tasks, timing, logistics, every the details and work needed to collection up a schedule together.
We maintained our meetings informal and light, but we contained everything native upcoming tests and project dates to play rehearsals, doctors’ appointments, and also weekend activities.
To protect against being a “nag,” i made certain I shared my schedule (and mine husband’s) too, therefore he knew if i was travel or had actually late night plans. Therefore, the knew if he could count on united state for a ride residence from an activity, an evening research session the night before an exam, etc., or needed to make different plans. By approaching ours time with each other as a joint planning session, mine son never felt ns was gift intrusive or critical.
Trust me as soon as I to speak it took a long time to gain to the point. However by constantly reminding him the he essential to understand if i was obtainable on specific days and times, made him available to me! Those weekly meetings also allowed me to assist him build time-management and also planning skills (so critical for those with executive functioning challenges) through encouraging him to think forward and also plan to achieve what he essential to acquire done. The also noted me an chance to offer critical support and encouragement.
I’m not sure if girlfriend have added children. But to do these meetings more “family-friendly,” i would regularly have mine older daughter sit in on them as well, especially when it was an extra liven week. Return she didn’t require the assistance necessarily, having actually her current helped my son feel much less like he was in the spotlight. Food because that thought.
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