Asking myself what I believe is like asking myself to look back on my past experiences while I reminisce on my past. All my beliefs I have today are from the challenges I went through during my younger years. I remember waking up every morning saying a prayer and giving my life to God. One morning I watched “A Cinderella Story” and heard a quote on there that stuck with me for life. The quote states “Never Let The Fear Of Striking Out Keep You From Playing The Game.” This quote had multiple meanings to me that I knew one day I’d share with other young adults who went through similar things as me. It had really opened my eyes and made me realize the strength i have gained through my troubled experiences of my past.
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To put it out there, I was beat and raped multiple times by family member whom I called my lifetime best friend. I had to face this man daily after he did those things to me. During these events I realized I was the only person that could reach out to those around me and inform them of what was being done. Being raped made me realize I was the only one who could actually speak up and take action. Speaking up was my biggest fear because I didn’t want to get another person that was so close to me in trouble. This man just walked back into my life to abuse and rape me. I couldn’t handle it anymore. I’d go to school and have bruises all over my arms.
This has taught me that running to someone for help is not striking out but saving yourself from being hurt and raped. Since this did happen when I was such a young age and went on for years I now see the actions I could have taken and didn’t because of fear. I am grateful that my belief was one of hurting someone else rather then protecting myself. I believe our lives reflect our past experiences. I believe that me being such a compassionate person kind of saved my life. To this day I look at myself in the mirror and see the reflection of the man who raped me. To this day I keep telling myself that same quote from tat same movie. “Never let the fear of striking out keep you from playing the game.” Meaning don’t ever be afraid to speak up and express what’s really on your mind.
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